First of all, Happy April Fool’s Day, Happy Birthday to our dearest Kinomoto Sakura and a bunch of other CLAMP characters! Also, happy several other key events I’ve failed to be online for, including International New Trials Day. I can’t believe the last time I updated the blog was one year ago this day! I do update a bit more through Instagram these days, though I think it’s difficult to give a substantial update over there.
I apologize for going off the grid in past several months, more so than usual, regardless of any New Trials updates. I’ve been dealing with some serious work-related issues, which have actually not been resolved with yet, but hopefully will be.
I assure you all, I haven’t given up on New Trials, but I think I’ve come to accept that the final chapters will probably have to be written in a block, rather than the piecemeal, chapter by chapter releases that I’ve been doing until now (but I may change my mind about this). Nonetheless, the Hong Kong chapter will be released in full before that. I’m really grateful the continued support all this time. When I began writing New Trials, writing itself was my joy and healing process. But here, in 2024, I’ve realized that the community that CCS and NT has brought me is the true joy and rare support system in my life. I’m not CLAMP, but CLAMP never finished X… Will Ai Yazawa ever finish Nana? Will Suzue Miuchi ever finish Glass Mask. Will Detective Conan ever go back to his original age? Such questions I dwell upon to fuel myself to continue on.
On a positive note, who would have thought but my Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle Saga AMV “This is My Road” has surpassed 1 million views. I never really ever planned on getting a million view video on YouTube. Then again, never really meant to write a nearly 2 million word fanfiction either. Actually, probably including unpublished chapters and side stories, New Trials is probably over 2 million words as well. If I had the Time Card in my hands, one thing I would probably do is go back and write out more chapters when I had a bit more leisure. But I think I don’t mind tackling the later chapters with the emotional maturity that I hopefully have gained now.
Happy Birthday Sakura and Happy April Fool's Day! There's no season quite like cherry blossom season, as fleeting as it may be.
I took Nendo!Sakura and NendoSyaoran out on their first outing ever, a cherry blossom date. Luckily, I found the perfect little cherry blossom tree to post them on. Unfortunately, Nendo!Syaoran lost both his shoes, arms and head in the process. In case you are wondering why he is such a grouch in all his photos.
If you haven't checked it out already, go see Part 1 of Wish-chan's Q&A over at the New Trials: The Podcast and Audiobook/ @newtrialsthepodcastandaudi2890
It was so much fun answering all the questions! Part 2 is on its way too!
Music Spotlight: Busker Busker's "First Love" 첫사랑
Busker Busker is most famous for their 2012 hit song "Cherry Blossom Ending," considered the anthem of the spring in Korea. However, my favorite Busker Busker Song is "First Love," because of the rawness and urgency of the lyrics reminiscing about one's first love.
Also good news! Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card Arc anime is finally getting a sequel!
Happy New Year 2023! Has it really been a year since I last updated this blog? I honestly have never really been glad that a year's over, but I guess 2022 has been once of those years. The first third of the year was about recovering from my own personal injury, a broken leg, then the second third was about overcoming a family illness, an even more difficult time, though things seem to have turned out all right. And the last third was a mixture of work stress, mainly dealing with bureaucracy, but also rediscovering some of the things I loved. Yes, it's the Y2K boom, and I love it. I love the turn-of-the-millenium fashion, hairstyles, shows being made about the era. I heard Cardcaptor Sakura: Clear Card-hen is finally ending next year (I guess this year). I haven't really been keeping up since the anime ended, so I am very much looking forward to its end and finally a Season 2 in the anime.
I know all of you guys are waiting for an actual New Trials main story update, but I posted a Nadeshiko special that's been sitting around for at least 10 years. It's not really the most uplifting story for the start of a new year, but when I rediscovered it, it made me sit down and reimmerse into Nadeshiko, which is why I decided to share it. I enjoy that CLAMP has been delving into Nadeshiko in the Clear Card-hen, because she really was an underexplored character in the original CCS story. Without further ado, "Angel of Death: A Nadeshiko Special" can be found at ff.net. I uploaded it as a separate story because I couldn't really figure out where to fit it in the New Trials chapters. I guess I would read it right after Chapter 70: Eye of the Dragon.
If you guys haven't already checked it out, please go listen to the new New Trials Audiobook narrated by the wonderfully talented Melanie Hardy (and podcast also with our Amethyst Beloved/Preya) over on YouTube @newtrialsthepodcastandaudi2890. They spent so much time planning this out and bringing it to life, and it's also one of my bucket lists seeing (hearing?) NT become an audiobook. Please do give them a like and a subscribe as well!
Also, I'd forgotten I had a cute Christmas outfit for Nendo-Sakura planned out months ago. I still love my Nendoroids very much. Thank you pandemic for letting me discover this strange adorable world of Obitsuroids. Except, Nendo-Syaoran is perpetually scowling at me (and Sakura). I know I update the blog less frequently, but I do post more often on Instagram!
Once again, hope you all had a Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and wish all of you the best tidings for 2023!
I realize I haven’t written any new blog posts in a while
though I’ve been giving small updates over Instagram and Facebook. The year
2021 will probably be a “lost year” in terms of New Trials, because I didn’t
make the significant writing progress that I thought I would in the past year. While
there are other factors involved, the pandemic in large has sort of sapped a
lot of joy in life for many, and I think I too was running on autopilot survival
mode in the past year. Meaning, I was (barely) functioning through daily life,
but a large part of creativity has been sapped away. For me, writing New Trials
is a joyous, fulfilling experience, and I was not able to channel that self amid
all the chaos across the globe. There is also the other part, as you all
probably figured, New Trials is in its final stretch and the next section is
the finale, and as a writer who has been working on this story since 1999, I
want it to be able to provide this mega fanfiction the ending it deserves, and
also to meet the expectations of readers who stuck by this long and have been
so supportive and patient. And it’s also my personal desire to have no regrets when
this story ends (when it ends). I also broke a leg and have been in
recuperation mode for the past several weeks, another reflective period of time.
I’ve come to realize I’m definitely not the best type of person to adjust to a
once in a lifetime respiratory virus pandemic, but it might also have to do
with my line of work.
I did manage to fulfill my bucket list of having chibi Sakura
and Syaoran dolls through purchasing Good Smile Company Nendoroids and
modifying them to become Obitsuroids. The first Nendos I got was 918 Nendoroid
Sakura Kinomoto: Tomoeda Junior High Uniform Ver. and Nendoroid 763 Syaoran Li.
I might have gotten some more since. I was never a figure person and was a doll
person since I was a child. As a kid, I used to draw personalized paper dolls
with friends and dress them up in self-designed outfits (yes, I was such a
Tomoyo). I always wanted a Cardcaptor Sakura ball-jointed doll but always thought
it would be too much work to customize and take up too much space. But I love how
tiny and cute Obitsuroids are. They took quite a bit of time to collect, as
they are out of stock and I got mine new from the secondhand market. I at first
didn’t get the appeal of Nendoroids, but oh what a slippery slope when you
realize how adorable they are. My Sakura and Syaoran Nendos are currently my
mascots and give me renewed inspiration toward CCS, and I’ve been sharing
photos on my Instagram account. The thing is, I think even bigger than my loss
of writing inspiration, because I actually have been writing throughout the
pandemic, is a loss of artistic inspiration. So having a photography outlet is
sort of a nice diversion and hopefully a step toward getting artistic
inspiration again.
Because the NT/CCS
community is so diverse and spread across the world, I spent a lot of time
thinking of all the readers and people I’ve been able to communicate with over
the years, and still am in reach with to this day. I am grateful to have this
community, and amid such trying times (no pun on New Trials), I appreciate more
what we have, which is a venue where we can share like hobbies, interests and
creativity. Cardcaptor Sakura going strong after all these years, with
merchandise retaining popularity even now, shows its universal appeal (one
which I think has not been quite replicated in the mahou shoujo/ magical girl
category to date). It’s hard to find a series that resonates so hard because I
think the fast-past nature of anime and media in general these days targets
things that are more sensational and triggering. Hence a lot of shounen hero
type stories, a lot more isekai and big franchise anime and so few good shoujo
series with quality animation.
On a brighter note, have you watched Disney’s Encanto—best Disney
movie in years IMO coming from a complete Disney traditionalist. It’s like one
of three movies I’ve watched in the past year. The songs are also so spot on,
and I can relate to all three sisters. I
think the pandemic has been a soul-searching time for many. For some people, it’s
appreciating family and loved ones, others finding that time to cultivate an
unexplored hobby or a neglected craft. For some, it has been changing jobs,
moving, or giving back to community. For me, writing has always been that
unwavering constant in my life, which I was reminded of even stronger during
the past year. So, in the long run, I may be able to look back on this time as
maybe a “lost year” for New Trials but not one for me in my journey as a
writer.
I hope all of you good
health and better tidings for 2022, the Year of the Black Tiger!
Music Spotlight: Andrew Garfield's “30/90” from the movie "tick, tick…BOOM!"
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Along with a lack of artistic inspiration also came a lack of appealing new music to listen to. I've been listening to Joe Hisaishi and piano instrumental collections all year round pretty much, my go to writing playlist. The exceptions were Hamilton and "tick, tick…BOOM!" If you can't tell, I've been on a Lin-Manuel Miranda roll the past half year. If Les Miserables is my favorite musical of all time, Rent is my favorite modern rock musical in a different way. The pandemic's impact on Broadway and the performing arts has been devastating, but I hope in turn people's appreciation and support for artists continue to grow because there is nothing that can quite replace that live performance thrill. As a Rent fan, I've always been haunted by Jonathan Larson's story and thought a movie about him wouldn't do him justice but was very pleasantly surprised by Miranda's directorial debut "tick, tick…BOOM!" Andrew Garfield was amazing as Larson, and a great singer to boot. I've been trying to convince everyone to watch the film and nobody watched it. As I mentioned, it's one of three movies I've watched this year so I don't have a lot to compare to, but it hit all the right notes for any fan of Rent for a Broadway-deprived person.
First off, slightly belated Happy Birthday to our one and only Kinomoto Sakura! This marks my first blogpost of this year, and I missed a bunch of holidays since the Halloween post. But the past year, as I think for many people, is sort of a black hole in my mind, hence maybe such a void is represented here as well. Still, things are looking up, aren't they, one year and some later? There was much lost because of the pandemic, but it has also been an opportunity to remind us of the things we are blessed with. Mind you, it's been difficult to remember this at times for me, as it must have been for everybody around the globe. For me, a part of the difficulty was trying to carry on with a semblance of normalcy when things really aren’t normal. But speaking of blessings, I had the New Trials community on my mind a lot during this time, because for me, it is the most global network of friends that I have, so my thoughts were with this community (despite my lack of updates). It has also been a source of solace for me, to see all of you doing well and going on.
I think I experienced perhaps the greatest lack of creative inspiration I have ever experienced in my life in the past year. Some people during quarantine and social distancing rediscovered or got in touch with their creative sides, and it was a time for much fruitful outcome. That was definitely not the case for me. I thought creative inspiration came from within, but I guess it must have been more external influence than I had thought it to be. Funny thing is, it's not like I spent the last year watching tons of Netflix either. All my friends list off all these Netflix shows I have to watch but maybe I'm the last person left on earth that is not subscribed to Netflix (because I know I'll never get off if I get started). The thing is, I think I have not really enjoyed anything that I usually enjoy in the past year, whether it be writing, art, listening to music or discovering new shows. I enjoy fashion and makeup, for example, but haven’t even opened up the fashion magazines I am subscribed to in the past year. My writer's block wasn't just toward New Trials but also related to work. I just wasn’t feeling inspired at all. So, kudos to everybody who was able to increase creative productivity during the pandemic, but I guess I learned that in times of duress, I'm the type that shuts down the creative juice when going into survival mode. I've always thought that if you take away writing from me, I will be empty. And it a sense, I did feel rather empty during this period. I did read a lot though, which I guess is a part of stripping down to the basics in survival mode for me. Of course, I live in a country that didn't really lock down and continued on with life and work, albeit limited social contact, so I feel like I moved through this past year in a haze, and here we are in the spring of 2021, sort of emerging from the fog, into a new frontier of a post-pandemic era.
I did get over my writer's block, or fundamentally lack of any creative inspiration, earlier this year and am eager to get back to New Trials and other projects, but then workload’s been overwhelming because three of my juniors quit in the past three months. I exploded at my boss for the first time last week and finally told him something along the lines of, "I have human limitations, and there is a limit to how much I can cover for everybody else's slack." I'm not usually the type that speaks out, but I guess I had my breaking point too. Anyhow, I felt a whole bunch better afterwards. I am sort of a workaholic in that I feel responsible to do well in my job, or any assignment I am given, but I also need plenty of my “own time” and Asian work culture and general culture really just doesn’t appreciate that unfortunately (don’t let me get started on family).
The latest fanart of Sakura is me trying to prove to myself that Sakura can look good in lavender and realizing again it really isn't her color. I always took to heart a comment someone once left on my Sakura and Eron fanart on devianart that lavender really isn't Sakura's color. I think I finally realized it’s probably because Sakura is warm-toned with her hair color and green eyes, and lavender is a cool-toned color. Personal color is a bit trend in K-Beauty. This was supposed to be a really quick fanart just to mark Sakura’s birthday and then suddenly the flowers exploded everywhere. It took as much time drawing flowers as it did the rest of the fanart, hence this is slight belated. Am I the only one who wishes April Fool’s Day can be declared an international holiday? I hate it when it falls on a week day so I can’t properly celebrate Sakura’s birthday, being an otaku at heart. Also, I don’t think I’ll be drawing flower wreaths again unless it’s someone’s wedding in the New Trials-verse. The thing is (mumbles) I was supposed to have a grand new update in time for Sakura’s birthday but I didn’t and considered disappearing even longer but that’s just not right. I missed New Year’s Day, the Yahoo New Trial Community’s anniversary in February, plus Valentine’s Day and White Day, so I will also mark those here as well! And this is a fanart for Christmas since I didn’t write a separate Christmas blogpost.
Music Spotlight: IU – Celebrity
I especially loved the lyrics to this song, and found it very healing when it came out. It's less about stardom and more about how each individual is unique and special in their own odd little way. “Byul” means star in Korean and the song rather reminds me of Sakura as well.
Happy Halloween and also happy 21st anniversary of New Trials! I drew the chibi sketch for Halloween 2019. In Naoko's fantasy, Sakura probably is a cute, klutzy novice witch, while Syaoran is the head of an ancient vampire clan.
Of course, fall 1999 is also when I first published the New Trials of Card Captor Sakura on the internet, before the age of E-books. Time does fly, doesn't it? I think the greatest blessing is that we all grew up together, the CCS characters, the readers, and myself of course as well. I think in the difficult times we are in, we seek comfort in those things that are familiar to us, things that give us happiness, and the CCS and New Trials community is one of those things that I feel blessed to have with me. So, despite my sporadic updates, I just want to say how much I love you all and how grateful I have this community with me, as a part of my DNA.
Music Spotlight:
I've been missing Broadway every since I finally got to see the Hamilton film back in July. I missed out on getting tickets several times when I visited New York, and it was awesome seeing it with the original cast. I vibed so much with with Angelica Schuyler and haven't even recovered since. As a writer, sometimes you feel so jealous of another writer's way with words, and the history major in me also felt quite giddy. Sorry for ever doubting Lin-Manual Miranda. I'm not sharing any Hamilton songs because I think it's more enjoyable watching the show with virgin ears (like I did!). Instead, I know it's cliche, but I can't think of a better Halloween song. And I've been really revisiting Andrew Lloyd Webber again. Phantom of the Opera is the epitome of a musical, and I think should be everyone's entryway into Broadway. I only recently caught the Phantom of The Opera at the Royal Albert Hall from 2011 and it was perfection, though I am such an original cast loyalist. I also allude to Phantom of the Opera quite a few times in New Trials, hence today's choice. Strange, I was always Team Erik, and thought Christine Daae was a ninny. These days, I can't help just thinking what a gentleman Raoul is.
Happy Birthday to Li Syaoran 2020! I realized as I was drawing this why I never draw SS in battle costumes with their wand and sword and also why I avoid group pictures.
Maybe the pandemic is a time to tap into my inner creativity, as many people seem to be doing, but I feel like the past couple months have been more of a period in which all creativity has been sapped dry. I think Syaoran's birthday is always a good period to jolt me back on track. I haven't really been feeling much inspiration in work, in my personal writing, or even my hobbies, nor can I name a single good drama or movie I've seen recently. I don't even listen to much music anymore. I have been reading a lot however lately, and I find it cyclical. Reading then finding inspiration again to create.
Hope you are all staying healthy and sound.
Music Spotlight:
Mongol800: "Chiisana Koi No Uta (Song of a Small Love)"
This is a cute cover version though I prefer the original version because of how raw it is. The song was an insert in one of my favorite J-dorama from 2007 "Proposal Daisakusen" back in days I was obsessed with Yamapi. The song lyrics are so sweet and uplifting.
