Happy Birthday Sakura! New Trials Update: Chapter 65 Up!

Chapter 65: Cohabitation, Part Deux is up at http://wishluv.revolutionhosting.net/nt65.htm.

Happy Birthday to Kinomoto Sakura! (And Watanuki and TRC! Syaoran).

Happy April's Fool Day!

Music Spotlight: Color Bottle - Sayonara

Color Bottle is one of my lucky finds on Youtube. They are a rock band from Sendai that formed in 2004 but don't seem to be well known outside of Japan. There are those songs that somehow seem to just touch your heart, and "Sayonara" was one of those songs. The PV is very simple but poignant and bittersweet. I rather love the vocalist Takemori Masayuki's slightly raspy and very versatile voice. I am trying to get my hand on some of their discography. They are probably best known for doing to opening for the anime Casshern Sins, "Aoi Hana," which is an awesome song as well, much edgier than Sayonara. It sort of matches the mood of xxxHolic, especially the lyrics "Hey, why were we born? Hey, why did we meet?" I look forward to seeing more of Color Bottle's works in the future.



I had a hard time finding the lyrics to "Sayonara" and ended up having to do the English translations myself. I had to work off of Korean translations and my limited knowledge of Japanese grammar. It's sort of a pity that the poignancy of words gets lost in translation. I don't speak Japanese, but grammatically, Korean and Japanese are very similar and more interchangeable in translation. When I heard this song, I thought I would like it to be the third arc ending song for my fanfiction New Trials. Because I chose two Maaya Sakamoto songs already, I wanted to choose one that had male vocals. This song reminded me a lot of Syaoran. I also like how if you rearrange the letters of "sayonara" it spells out "Syaoran" plus an a. Three down, just one more ending song to find. ^_^

On a side note, Chapter 65 of New Trials, Cohabitation Part II, is coming along. I think a week or so to fine tune and edit and it should be out.

Color Bottle – Sayonara (カラーボトル - サヨナラ)

Goodbye, every day until today, let us walk on from here
Even if this feeling that tightens my chest will become a memory
I won't forget, I won't forget.

No matter how much we do not want to change, we cannot help but change
The warmth of your last touch still remains in my left hand so real.
From where did we go so differently
When everything used to shine so brightly.

Goodbye, every day until today, let us walk on from here
Even if the feeling that tightens my chest will someday become a memory
I won’t forget, I won’t forget.

When we met, I didn’t need anything else but your smile
Hugging tightly, we shared are insecurities, but in our hearts somewhere
We both realized that the colors had begun to fade
The color of this path and even of the evening sunset.

Goodbye, every day until today, goodbye, the scenery with you in it
All the sincerity that tightens my chest seems to be changing into memories
If this door is opened, there is no more returning
It is the first movement to a new sky
Even if I cannot walk properly, even if tears fall
Still, still…

Goodbye, every day until today, goodbye. The scenery with you in it,
The small back, the moist eyes, the face with the innocent smile, I really loved it all.
Goodbye, every day until today, from here I will walk on
Even if this feeling that holds my heart will someday become a memory
I won’t forget, I won’t forget, so I will not forget.

Wacom Intuos4 Review

As you all know, I've been eying the Wacom Intuos4 Tablet for the longest time. I have been using the precursor to the Wacom Bamboo series, a Wacom Graphire3 Sapphire. After much thought and hesitation, I finally justified that I've been working hard enough, and I deserve a present for myself. I ordered it on Sunday and got it on Tuesday, so I was very excited (after like 11 months of coveting it). I started out by stalking E-bay for a while, but in the end, I gave in and purchased a new one, because I was tempted by the sensation of opening up a pretty new box and E-bay prices were not that much cheaper. I enclosed some pictures of the box, inside the box, the tablet, the pen and the mouse. Everything is very sleek and pretty in black.

I had the hardest dilemma of choosing between an Intuos Small and Medium (the most popular and recommended size). In the end, I chose a Small because as an amateur hobbyist, I couldn't justify paying over $100 more for a couple square inches more of drawing space. I'm glad I chose the Small, because firstly, I just don't have space on my desk (though I like drawing on my bed), and also, I use a laptop with a 15.5 screen, hence having a bigger tablet won't do much for me anyway. Plus, the Intuos working space dimensions is still bigger than my old Graphire. I ended up getting a good deal on my Intuos4 Small, the best deal I found on the net, so I'm pretty satisfied. I would like to one day try drawing on a Medium though.

Truthfully, I haven't used my Intuos a whole lot yet because I'm a bit afraid to touch it. Lol. Off the top, the Inuos4 pen has a 2048 levels of sensitivity, twice more than its predecessor, Intuos3. My Graphire had 0 sensitivity because I dropped the pen very early on, and the nib end went dead, so I have been using the eraser end to paint all this time, which is basically like using a mouse in the shape of stick. So, yes, I never really got to experience the whole "pressure sensitivity" before, and it was amazing to have tilt recognition and actually be able to sketch straight into Photoshop/ Paint Tool SAI. And I like how the Intuos pen is heavier and more solid feeling, and with the pen holder, hopefully I won't drop this pen as much.

I'm rather used to the smooth, slippery plastic feel of the Graphire tablet, whereas Intuos4 has a rough, papery texture which some people love, some people don't. There have been some complaints on the net regarding pen nib-wear, which I guess I will experience eventually. The pen-holder comes with 10 replacement nibs, which I have yet to play around with, which come niftily inside the pen holder. The mouse seems pretty useless as usual, but is at least more functional than the Graphire mouse. The biggest difference on the Intuos4 tablet is the ExpressKey buttons and the I-Pod like radial scroll button, which is very useful. I have yet to fiddle around with the different functions of the ExpressKey.

The biggest issue I had was in the beginning, getting the drivers to function properly. The latest driver was useless--it made Photoshop crash. Anyhow, after two hours of fiddling around with different drivers, everything worked. Truthfully, the first time I used the Intuos, I sort of missed my Graphire and having to do everything manually, from changing pressure to switching between functions. And then, perhaps it was the papery texture of the tablet that I began to miss traditional medium, the feeling of paper and pencil, of watercolor and color pencils, of my brush. Of course the first thing I drew was Sakura and Syaoran--it didn't take me too long to adjust to the Intuos, because after using the eraser end of a pressureless Graphire, you realize how little effort you need to be able to sketch with an Intuos4 (which still requires more hand-eye coordination than drawing on traditional medium). I haven't really painted with Intuos much, but hopefully I'll get a chance to. I might put some comparison pictures up of my Graphire and Intuos for reference if anyone wants it, because I know I would have liked some reference pics.

I haven't really finished inking the sketch yet (so you can see the rough sketch underneath) and began on another piece, but I might finish this one up later. Truthfully, I'm having the worse case of a writer's block at the moment. January and February have been pretty crazy, but I've finally been trying to catch up on emails. I've been staring at Chapter 65 for the past two weeks without making a dent (though I had quite a bit written from back in December/ January). Drawing CCS related stuff usually is a first step to recovering from a writer's block for me which I failed to mention in my fanfiction writing process guide.

Happy Lunar New Year! Music Spotlight: Radwimps

Young Sakura and Syaoran Date by ~wishluv on deviantART
It's the year of the tiger now. Time seems to fly by, doesn't it? I wish I had more New Trials news, but I've been so busy that I haven't had much time to work on Chapter 65 (which by the way I am having so much fun writing ^^). I just posted an old fanart of young Sakura and Syaoran on a date. A Valentine's date, I wonder? Lol. They used to be so cute. I wanted to coordinate them in complimentary preppy outfits. I think one of Syaoran's appeal is his awesome fashion sense; he breaks the mold of male characters and never appears wearing the same day-to-day clothes twice. I remember when I first saw CCS, I wondered how Syaoran, this poor, fatherless boy who is very serious in his "mission" and a tough guy to boot has such a fabulous style of fashion. It was quite a conundrum until I watched Card Captor Sakura Movie 1 and finally realized, ah, he has four sisters. And then, everything made sense to me.

So, Happy Valentine's Day everyone! Today's song is a sort of an anti-Valentine's Day song? :P I discovered Radwimps some time ago from Order-Made (one of those simple but surprisingly profound and resonant songs that you must hear/and watch the PV) and they've been on my playlist a lot lately. They started off as high school friends in 2001 and have since then exploded in popularity in Japan, one of those rare indie-group success stories, I think. One of my favorites is Radwimp's 05410 - (n) because it's angsty lyrics in contrast to the upbeat and very addictive tune. The vocalist Noda Yojiro has a really smooth voice and his English is pretty good since he lived in the US for a couple years; Radwimps does quite a few English songs, sort of like Ellegarden. Do check out their other songs as well; they have many awesome songs with catchy melodies, poignant lyrics and just a raw, unpretentious and sincere ambiance about their music (coming from someone who's been guiltily indulging in a lot of over-processed pop lately).


The title 05410-(n) (0="o" 5="ko" 4="shi" 10="ten" - (n) can be translated to "Okoshite~" which means "wake me up."
Radwimps - 05410-(ん)

Wake me up, wake me up, wake me up when you come back
I'll be here, I'll be waiting here for you.

I can be your best friend
I can be your least friend
I can be your boyfriend
But I don't wanna be your ex-friend.
Don't you know this guy who sang a song
About the highest common factor and so
It's kind of how this is, I'll tell you what it is
About all your questions you have asked.

Wake me up, wake me up, wake me up, when you come back
I'll be here, I'll be waiting here for youIf the size of the sky makes you frightened then come back
And then cry so that I might, could hug you.
This is our fifth talk of breaking up, but this time there is something different
The usual "short term memory loss" for some reason isn't working this time.

It's fine by me if you thought "I don't want this anymore"
But you are the one who said "goodbye," so why did you cry?

Wake me up, wake me up, wake me up, when you come back.
If that answer is "no", what should I do?
Should I cry? Should I die? Or go crazy and then fly?
Better yet should I kiss myself "don't mind."
Wake me up, wake me up, wake me up when you come back
I'll be here, I'll be waiting here for you.
Pick me up, pick me up, pick me up when you come back
Until then, I will save this song for you.

Now come back, now come back, now come back, I'll take it back
I'll be here, I'll be here, I'll be waiting here for you.

Lyrics partly from here.

Music Spotlight: Angela Aki - Tegami ~ Haikei Juugo no Kimi he

Angela Aki - Tegami ~ Haikei Juugo no Kimi he (Greetings to a Fifteen-Year-Old)



I have kept an eye on singer, songwriter Angela Aki for some time now ever since I heard her ending for the anime Blood+ "This Love." My favorite song by her is "Tegami ~ Haikei Juugo no Kimi he (手紙 ～拝啓 十五の君)," which was originally written for the NHK National School Music Contest in 2008, Junior High Division. The first time I heard the song and read read the lyric translation, it brought tears to my eyes, and it is a song that still makes me tear up when I listen to the lyrics.

The song cleverly weaves together the POV of a fifteen-year-old letter to his or her adult self and the message of that adult self addressing his/her fifteen year old self and something about this imagery rings home to a lot of us. Angela Aki accompanies herself on the piano and while the melody is simple, the lyrics are very poignant and I think reaches out to that lost fifteen-year-old in all of us. I find this song a "healing" song that rings true without any pretense. The clever use of shifting points of view creates a multi-layered tone of the song. The song's message uplifting and optimistic but the point of view of the adult holds a bittersweet sense of nostalgia. It makes me recall my fifteen-year-old self. That year was sort of the black hole of my teenage years, so I guess that is why this song is even more meaningful to me.

Translated lyrics by PhatParis:

Dear you,
Who is reading this letter
Where are you, and what are you doing now?

For me, who is 15 years old,
There are worries that I can't tell anyone.
If this is a letter addressed to my future self,
Surely I can confide in myself.

Now, it seems that I'm about to be defeated and I'm about to cry
For me, who is seemingly about to disappear
Whose words should I believe in?
This one-and-only heart has been broken so many times
In the midst of this pain, I live the present, I live in the present.

Dear you, thank you,
I have something to tell the 15-year-old you.

If you continue to ask what you should do and where you should go,
You will be able to see the answer.

The rough sea of youth may be tough
But row your boat of dreams on towards the shores of tomorrow.

Now, please don't be defeated and please don't shed a tear
During those times when you're seemingly about to disappear
Just believe in your own voice
For me as an adult, there are sleepless nights when I'm hurt
But I'm living the bittersweet present.

There's a meaning to everything in life
So build your dreams without fear.
Keep on believing

Seems like I'm about to be defeated and I'm about to cry,
For me, who's seemingly about to disappear
Whose words should I believe in?

Please don't be defeated and please don't shed a tear
During those times when you're seemingly about to disappear
Just believe in your own voice

No matter era we're in
There's no running away from sorrow,
So show your smile, and go on living the present
Go on living the present.

Dear you,
Who's reading this letter
I wish you happiness...

The song was paired with animation from drawings by mangaka Natsuki Takaya of Fruits Basket fame for Minna no Uta, a short NHK program geared towards children pairings songs from various musicians (including Maaya Sakamoto and Utada Hikaru) with various animators, artists and directors. I especially like the one by Makoto Shinkai. These Minna no Uta segments are sort of like MADs/ AMVs with professionals, broadcast on national television.



When I first heard the song, I could see Sakura in Arc 4 of New Trials looking back to herself in Chapter 53: Yesterday's Letter. It also reminds me of that scene in Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle: Tokyo Revelations when young CCS!Sakura shows up and tells Sakura-hime that everything is going to be all right. As adults, I think many of us have moments where we think, "Ah, I wish I knew then what I know now." But on the reverse, there are times when we think, "Ah, I wish I can go back to those days when those little things that I worried about seemed like the greatest worry in the world and those little things that made me happy were the greatest bliss."

Japanese lyrics and translation also found here.

Fanfiction Spotlight: Chronicles and Trials

Chronicles and Trials TheamPic by ~WinxC1ub on deviantART

I've been promising WinxC1ub-chan that I would be able to read her fanfiction "Chronicles and Trials" once I finish Chapter 64. Gomen, I took a long time! Anyhow, I finally got around to reading it finally, and I love the premise. Our main characters are Hiiragizawa Daidouji Renae and Li Kinomoto Seiru (yes, you can do the math ^_^) and there are lots of familiar faces everywhere, from both the CLAMP universe and New Trials characters cameos as well!

It's very fascinating reading about an alter-universe New Trials amongst other things. Lol. It's like one of those Russian matryoshka dolls, a fanfiction within a fanfiction. Lol. Needless to say, I was most excited to see Eron's appearance. I'm sort of ashamed to say it's been many years since I read a CCS fanfiction. Don't get me wrong, I love reading CCS fanfics, but I think I sort of made a conscious sacrifice when I began writing New Trials that I probably will not be reading CCS fanfics and use that time to write New Trials. I remember when I was 12 and very innocent and naive as a newcomer to the world of fanfiction and stumbled upon a CCS one-shot lemon. There were just a handful of CCS fanfics at that time, and I really just read randomly (no picking and choosing back then.) I had no idea what a lemon was at that time and was a bit traumatized with the one-shot about a certain Lust Card and Sakura and Yukito-san. Don't ask anymore. Well, in the long run, I think all the trauma I felt when characters were OOC helped me write New Trials. When I began writing New Trials, I used to be afraid of the "bleeding" of ideas, which was sort of why I did not even read Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle for the longest time. But I've reached a point in New Trials were I became so comfortable with the realm, characters and plot, that I no longer have those worries. Heck, CLAMP parodies their own work. Lol.

Anyhow, check out WinxC1ub's fanfiction "Chronicles and Trials" which is a big crossover between New Trials and Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle among other things. The fourth chapter is on its way. She has many adorable CCS-related artwork up on her devianart account. She also makes lots of wonderful New Trials AMVs that you can check out on her youtube channel. Arigatou!


Lost Sunrise by ~WinxC1ub on deviantART

Merry Christmas! Chapter 64 Up!

Chapter 64: A Christmas Miracle is up!



As usual, it's version one. This month has been such a hectic one, and even though I had most of this chapter written months ago, I almost thought I would not finish on time. It is a much more character oriented chapter more than anything else and also perhaps a transitional chapter. The "Memory" arc is finished, and we will sort of move to the second part of arc 4. For those of you who are wondering, Arc 4 will definitely be longer than the other arcs.

Merry Christmas and happy holidays everyone!


Kiseki: The Promise of Spring by ~wishluv on deviantART